Communications lessons from my teenager

For anyone raising a teenager right now – I see you, I feel you, and holy [insert your choice expletive], I am with you.

It is emotionally exhausting.

Way harder than the 2s and 3s . I would happily trade one teen for one – or even two – toddlers right now. Honestly, teens are potty-trained toddlers in big bodies.

If you don’t have a teen, but work with someone, are friends with someone or have a family member with one, tell those parents they are doing a great job.

I keep reminding myself I’m learning so many life lessons. Patience. Compassion. Resilience. Self-care. Boundaries.

But the biggest lesson that keeps coming through loud and clear is this:

Teens just want to be heard.

They don’t want your opinion. They just want you to acknowledge what they’re saying. 

One way to do this is through reflective listening. My therapist introduced me to this technique. Basically, all you do is mirror back whatever statement someone says but framed as a question. You refrain from any emotion or judgment – regardless of how outrageous their statement may seem.

Putting it into practice.

Here’s how reflective listening has looked with my kid.

My teen :: “I don’t see the purpose in school.”

Me :: “Ah, you think school is pointless?”

My teen :: “I really hate you and my dad right now.”

Me :: “So you hate me right now?”

My teen (in response to me saying I needed a break sometimes as a single parent): “Well I never get a break from you or my dad!”

Me :: (oops. did not practice reflective listening.)

Initially I thought “This is stupid. There is no way this is going to work.”

But weirdly, it did. The more I reflected back what my teen said, the quicker their emotions dissipated. And even more surprising, the more they opened up — instead of the usual “I don’t know” angsty response to my typical litany of questions.

Lesson for grown ups

Is there a lesson here for adults in adult relationships? Maybe it’s that people — no matter what age — just want to be heard. If they want advice, they’ll ask for it.

Most of all, they just want to feel seen and acknowledged. 

And maybe, just maybe, all of us could benefit from listening more – and judging less.

To learn more about Reflective Listening, check out the video below for an additional explanation and examples.

 

A makeover that earned $700K

I’m a sucker for makeover shows.

Queer Eye, Fixer Upper and basically the entire HGTV lineup.

Here's a little makeover of my own -- a story makeover.

The backstory
In early 2020, my client, Green Space Learning, received a nearly $1 million grant from the Texas Workforce Commission to train early childhood educators.

Due to COVID, they were unable to host the large, in-person training sessions initially planned, and Green Space was concerned about meeting the goals of the grant.

With just three months left in the grant cycle, Green Space came to me to help market and project manage the program.

The before

 

The after

In December 2021, Green Space hosted the first of four remaining in-person workshops. They worked with a videographer to produce a promo video using footage from the December workshop.

It wasn’t a bad video, but it didn’t really show the “why” behind the workshop, and it didn’t position Green Space either.

Plus the holiday theme made it less evergreen to use for promoting future events.

 

I worked with Green Space’s CEO on messaging to talk about the purpose of the workshop and the benefit to teachers.

We shot the video on my iPhone in about five minutes.

I then developed a script and storyboard based on her comments, the footage from the December event and a few graphics I created in Canva.

The videographer put it all together based on my direction, and within two days, voila!

And then what happened?

Green Space applied for a new grant for Phase 2 of their training program, and we sent the funders the video to showcase how we would be marketing future events.

Guess who got an almost $700K renewal? Clearly it’s based on Green Space’s program and the results, but the video is a great visual for funders to actually see their dollars in action.

Oh, and we surpassed the grant attendance goals after just the second event.

Now that's a makeover with impact.

 

  • A good story needs a good foundation. Knowing your audience, goals, message and what you want people to do (your call to action or CTA) is always the best starting point.

  • You don’t need a huge budget to create good content. What existing content can you recycle to create a new piece?

  • The moment doesn’t always call for a perfect and polished piece. We’re not expecting an Addy or an Emmy, but our video was exactly what was needed to reach potential attendees through social media and emails.

If you're in need of a content makeover or you want some help developing a strategic structure for your narrative, click here to schedule a 30-minute consult with me

Funder activities are on the rise!

The good news? Funding to nonprofits is on the upswing! In a 2022 survey conducted by Sage Intact, 44% of nonprofit respondents saw an increase in revenue in 2021, up by 21% in 2020. 

This piece of insight is included in the 2022 Nonprofit Technology Trends Survey, by Sage Intact. 

Social media + storytelling

In other good news, the survey revealed that nonprofits have amped up their reliance on social media to connect with supporters and funders. With increased funding and use of digital platforms, there’s an even greater need for compelling storytelling.

What’s one of the best ways to tell your mission’s story? Data. 

According to the report, “Survey respondents who tell their story using outcome metrics were 82% more likely to have increased corporate donations.” 

Metrics count when it comes to funders and strategic partners. They want to see measurable impact and data when it comes to understanding what your nonprofit is doing.

1 + 1 = Social Math

Social math is one way to incorporate data into your story in a compelling, engaging way. 

What exactly is social math? Consider it a visual analogy to provide context around the true impact of your organizations donations, programs and advocacy.  Whether it’s lives saved, meals served or homes built, social math helps your most important audiences understand the impact of your organization.

This infographic from the Center for Science in the Public Interest is a great example of social math. It shows how much exercise you need to do in order to burn off the calories the average American consumes each day in sugar.

 
 

Or consider this pop culture-relevant social math graphic from the City of Minneapolis.

Telling your own story

However you choose to tell your story, Write.Cause can help your nonprofit or mission-driven business develop a strategic narrative using real data-driven metrics.

Email us to set up a free 30-minute consult to develop your story.

To download the full Sage Report, click here.